Monthly Archives: July 2010

Cats for Gold!

Posted on July 30, 2010 by Ken

As usual Glenn Beck’s got it wrong. Rather than investing in overpriced gold coins, you should be turning your dingy gold into shiny new cats! Act now!

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Bringing Home the Bacon, Frying it up in a Pan

Posted on July 29, 2010 by Ken

Finally, when someone asks me, “Who are your lesbian butchers?” I can answer, “Erica and Amelia!” They’re heading to West Hollywood (801 Fairfax to be exact) to open up a butcher shop called “Lindy & Grundy’s.” They plan on selling … Continue reading →

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The More Things Change…

Posted on July 29, 2010 by Ken

Here’s a great photo from 1927′s ground-breaking “Metropolis.” That’s most likely Brigitte Helm in the robot costume, having a refreshing sip while an assistant blows (hopefully) cold air into a crack in the metal. Fifty years later, here’s Anthony Daniels … Continue reading →

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Pleasant… Dreams…

Posted on July 28, 2010 by Ken

Mwahahahahaha! (A manequine at Philadelphia AIDS Thrift.) Via pictureisunrelated.com.

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You Can’t Insure the First Man on the Moon

Posted on July 28, 2010 by Ken

So. You’re about to boldly go where no man has gone before. But Fred, your trusty State Farm agent says the home office just ain’t gonna sign off on life insurance for someone who’s about to go to the Moon. … Continue reading →

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Potty Training Aid of the Day

Posted on July 28, 2010 by Ken

Hey folks! Have a young child who’s ready for potty training, but the whole process just seems too easy? Give this terrifying urinal a shot! Guaranteed… To make potty training your little rascal a Freudian nightmare! To cause your child … Continue reading →

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Sisters Sought After Woman Dies From Silicone Injections in Buttocks

Posted on July 28, 2010 by Ken

People, how many times do I have to say it? If you feel the need to have a bigger butt, please please please go to a licensed butt enhancer. Or do it the old-fashioned way: Twinkies. Really, this is pretty … Continue reading →

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Chewy Tramples Nazis on a Giant Squirrel!

Posted on July 27, 2010 by Ken

I can’t believe I spent eight hours researching and writing that epic World War II post, and I still forgot to mention the most important event of the war: Click to see the original.

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Lady Gaga Kidnaps Commissioner Gordon!

Posted on July 27, 2010 by Ken

I’ll say what everyone else is thinking: Where was the Batman??? Full story at The Onion.

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New Jersey Stock Exchange

Posted on July 27, 2010 by Ken

I talked about World War II having “The worst atrocities ever committed by Humanity.” I forgot about “The Jersey Shore.” But I wonder… could they do any worse than the current crop of Wall Street psychopaths? Or is this what … Continue reading →

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